


Condemnation of freedom

by Bananas45



Category: B: The Beginning (Anime)
Genre: Heavy Angst, M/M, Minor Character Death, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 22:51:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14435856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bananas45/pseuds/Bananas45
Summary: There is a longer silence and Laica looks back to Minatsuki. Say something, explain something, they’re scared for fucks sake Minatsuki-“Talk about what?” His voice, soft and measured, still manages to pierce the air. The twins uncross their legs, leaning forward a little, eyes still downcast.“Quinn”Laica is shocked by sudden Minatsuki cruelty but loathed to admit he made him that way.





	Condemnation of freedom

**Author's Note:**

> So I started the show again from the start. Watched ep 1 and realised Minatsuki straight up sacrificed Quinn and no one ever mentions it again.  
> So, I wrote this as a sort of filler...ish.  
> It's pretty angsty tbh. Laica's ideas jump around a lot...as did mine as I tried to decide if I was angry at Minatsuki or not. 
> 
> This is also just on the wrong side of pretentious...so sorry about that. I just feel they both must have loads of regrets!!

The hum of the engine rings through the room and the sickening thought that they’re really stuck in each others presence, in the air, miles and miles up, is setting in. Laica can’t help but take a glance at Minatsuki, sat at the desk, cold glass of whiskey pressed to his temple as he writes something with his other hand. He shakes his wrist and it makes the ice chink against the side of the tumbler. The silence is heavy, tight and tense with unspoken words. They look contemplative, Laica notes. Or scheming. Izanami is spread across a chair, head tilted uncomfortably back, throat on show as she stares, unblinking at Kamui.  
“Are we going to talk about this” She says, not to him, the question is to Minatsuki but her gaze doesn’t falter.  
There is a longer silence and Laica looks back to Minatsuki. Say something, explain something, they’re scared for fucks sake Minatsuki-  
“Talk about what?” His voice, soft and measured, still manages to pierce the air. The twins uncross their legs, leaning forward a little, eyes still downcast.  
“Quinn” She clips the word and watches as Kamui practically flinches. “Where will we be meeting him?”  
You could hear a pin drop. The air is static and the temperature seems to rise around them. Laica watches Minatsuki, harder this time. His hair covers most of his face but his jaw line, he follows the line of his throat with his eyes as MInatsuki swallows, tempered and uncertain. Kamui is like a dog at the races, barely held back, waiting for the start gun and Laica glances between the two of them.  
“If he hasn’t made contact yet I doubt we’re meeting him anywhere” Minatsuki says. It’s the best response to give but Kamui let’s out a laugh so sharp it takes all of Laica’s willpower not to flinch. Instead he watches Minatsuki do it.  
“Just say it, Minatsuki” He snarls, unhinged as he drags his nails over the armrest. “Say it”  
Minatsuki looks up, with a smirk that’s halfway to a grimace. “I can’t read your mind, Kamui-”  
“He’s dead right?” Kamui bellows and everyone looks down, awkward and tight and probably upset. “You could have sent anyone of us-” He stalks closer till he’s standing over Minatsuki desk. “You could have sent anyone of us to deal with it and you sent him-”  
“Did you want me to send you?” Minatsuki laughs gently and Laica thinks it admirable that he’s not more fazed. He will be, under it all, Minatsuki hates confrontation like this, especially sober. “You would have died. Then again” Minatsuki, takes a sip, wincing a little. “I doubt Quinn would be standing here shooting spittle at me-”  
Kamui looks ready to burst, fists by his side. “You killed him”  
Minatsuki looks away, gaze almost meeting Laica’s but not quite reaching him. “I take full responsibility” the tone is unabashedly mocking and Kamui slams his fists down on the desk harder enough to make Minatsuki’s bottle shake.  
“You son of a-”  
“Why are you surprised. You knew, Minatsuki” Soft and measured from the sidelines. Laica turns to see Yuna, stood by a window. “That’s what you said. You were testing Koku. We were always going to leave without him, right?”  
It’s intentionally malicious even if her tone is innocent and Minatsuki’s eyes widen a little, it’s as close to a betrayal as they get here and Kamui is almost salivating at the chance he’s been given. Laica stands closer, worried for him- It’s stupid because it shouldn’t be but Kamui is a mad dog at the best of times and Minatsuki always seems fragile.  
“Fuck you, Minatsuki. Fuck you. You-you-” Kamui has tears in his eyes now, genuine and heart wrenching.  
“I?” Minatsuki chuckles, glass to his lips. “Take your tears somewhere else, Kamui. He’s dead. I killed him. Get over yourself-”  
Kamui backhands him, so hard Minatsuki’s head whips round and a shocked cry is pulled from his throat. The sound, like a finger click or a thunder clap, makes Laica’s stomach churn and with an odd bout of possessiveness he grabs Kamui’s wrist before he can try anything else.  
“Kamui” He says, voice level but heart in his throat as he glances at Minatsuki. He turns his head slowly, pulling his hair out his face as he blinks.  
Kamui is screaming “You left him behind! You promised me he’d be okay! You gave me your word!-”  
“The game” Minatsuki says, thumb on his lip to see if it’s burst. The side of his cheek is blossoming red, already bruising underneath. “Is dangerous. If you’re not willing to die” His voice sounds harsh, leaderlike and detached. “Get out now, Kamui”  
There is another pause. The others are watching, unsure how to respond but entranced to watch.  
Kamui lurches again, pushing Laica back he gets Minatsuki by the throat. The tumbler drops to the ground with a smash and Minatsuki’s hands go to Kamui’s forearms.  
“Would you have sent him?” He snarls, an inch away from Minatsuki’s face, he digs his fingers into Minatsuki’s windpipe. “Would you send him to die?”  
Laica watches Minatsuki eyes flash to his, it’s as much of a defeat as Kamui is going to get and he giggles.  
“Ahh, Minatsuki” He keens, quiet enough the others can’t hear. “Could you kill him?”  
Minatsuki barks out a breathless laugh, teeth clenched and face reddening, feet kicking a little.  
“In a second” He gasps out and strangely it hurts. Laica feels it deep in his chest, a strange tremble that he can’t place at all. The thought of Minatsuki caring that little. The thought that he created this beautiful monster, so cruel it can’t care for its own creator.  
Kamui drops him with a despairing sob, standing by the desk he tries to contain himself as Minatsuki pulls his cuffs straight and clears his throat.  
“Y-you heartless, spineless, cold piece of shit” Kamui says, low and cruel. “You should be lucky Laica wants to fuck you, pretty boy-”  
Minatsuki’s hand shoots out, viper fast and hauls down on Kamui’s tie. His head bounces of the oak wood with a splinter and Minatsuki throws him back with a soft, calm sigh.  
“You made me spill my drink” He says, short and angry but still smiling that smile, like the whole situation is baffling to him.  
Kamui’s tooth rolls to a stop at Laica’s feet and he looks up at the quietly stunned room.  
Izanami, smirk wide, begins to clap. “Bravo, what a performance, you two.”  
Minatsuki straightens his suit. “Clean up the mess” His eyes fall on Kamui, still curled and sobbing on the floor.  
They spring into action like a spell is broken. The twins drop to Kamui’s side and Izanami stands and strolls forward with a huff.  
Yuna still by the window, glances as Minatsuki comes past, hand on his throat she asks- “How’s your conscience, sir?”  
“Plenty clear” He says, soft and gentle, yet somehow so sharp and silencing. He’s angry at her. Laica isn’t surprised.  
He waits a moment, waits until they’re distracted and follows Minatsuki out. Annoyingly, he’s shaken. Shaken at the implication of Kamui’s loss. Shaken at the fact that Minatsuki had sacrificed Quinn without so much of a blink. Shaken, most of all, at himself because Minatsuki’s actions are his. He made Minatsuki to be cruel and cold and he feels stupid for now not being able to handle it.  
“Wait” He calls and Minatsuki stops, he doesn’t turn but as Laica takes a step closer he sees the tremble in his shoulders, the slouch of his back. If he’s crying he won't turn. Maybe he nots cruel, maybe he’s just strong. Laica isn’t sure what’s worse in the end.  
“Please, if you have any thoughts on the matter, let’s discuss them in the morning” Minatsuki sounds exasperated yet humoured. It’s a strange tone he takes a lot that’s perfectly unnerving, unsure whether what you’ve said annoys him or if he’s mocking you it set’s people on edge. Laica walks closer and closer still, until he can see how tightly coiled Minatsuki is, a string a breaking point, Laica almost feels bad. He reaches out and Minatsuki tilts his head back, slightly startled but able not to step back. It shows the harsh finger shaped marks around his slender neck and makes Laica irrationally angry.  
“You’ve cut your lip” Is all Laica says, hand ghosting the path he would caress but not letting his fingers touch. Minatsuki’s eyes flutter a little, human and fragile- so unlike the eyes that stared at the sobbing mess on the ground back there and walked away with a disappointed smirk- and he lets out a shaking breath.  
“You’re trembling, Minatsuki” Laica says, no emotion behind it but he is intrigued.  
“Yes, he gave me a proper scare” He runs a hand through his hair and trails it to the ends, playing idly with it. “Come to my room for a drink. I’ll get your opinion on what I should do about Kamui”  
It translates so effortlessly into ‘I need a drink, Kamui scares me, help’ but Laica knows him well enough not to bring it up.  
The room is spars and cold. Clinical and military and so unlike Minatsuki. Laica sits on the cold, unslept in bed and watches as Minatsuki makes himself a gin and tonic. Laica pretends to ignore the fact that the glass is filled mostly with gin with a top up of tonic and is, for the most part, flat but he thinks maybe Minatsuki deserves it.  
“Are you upset?” Laica asks, desperate to touch but he doesn’t. He won't be the one that needs this.  
“Upset doesn’t cover it” Minatsuki says, tilting his head back. “That whiskey was a vintage and awfully hard to come by”  
Laica grits his teeth, tempted to slap him too.  
“You know what I mean” Laica says, soft but frustrated.  
“I know what you mean” Minatsuki tells him but stops there.  
“Kamui won't forgive you” Laica looks up, hands interlaced, elbows balanced on his knees. Minatsuki looks down, calf crossed over the other and hand balancing the elbow, teeth biting on the glass softly, nervously. He sniffs.  
“I don’t expect him to”  
“He’ll ruin everything” Laica hisses.  
“Everything's in motion is it not? What does it matter” Minatuski sounds disillusioned, tongue clicking. The implication lies between. There is a timer on one of them. They hold gazes until Minatsuki laughs softly and glances down in an attempt to circumvent the whole topic.  
Laica stands, sudden and swift, the idea that this is all coming to an end, that Minatsuki won't always be here is overwhelming. He thinks of him, small compared to Kamui, legs kicking and breath a little frantic and brings their lips together with a thump as Minatsuki’s forced back against the wall. He almost drops his glass as he wraps his arms around Laica, tongue skimming along Laica’s lip in what could be a tease but this is Minatsuki and he’s ridiculously candid in these moments.  
“Does that scare you?” Minatsuki asks, eyes the brightest thing in the room, voice barely a whisper.  
“Does it scare you?” Laica counters, pushing their noses together, soft and affectionate even if it’s not. Minatsuki runs his fingers under his waistcoat, thumbs balanced on the seam as he traces it, eyes closed.  
“A little” he murmurs. “Sometimes a lot. Sometimes not at all. You can’t blame me for feeling weak can you, Laica?”  
Laica shakes his head and gently strokes his thumb over the bruising across Minatsuki’s high cheekbones, it’s gone a bright red, already purpling in the centre and he curls his nose.  
“This looks sore” he murmurs, kissing it as softly as he can.  
“Laica” It’s light and contemplative, breathed out as Laica undoes his his shirt, caressing over pale, unmarked skin that looks so paper thin and fragile against the bruises on his neck. “Will you cry for me like he did for Quinn?”  
He stops his movements, frozen with fear and settled realisation that yes, Minatsuki will die, there is a chance they may all die. He slaps him, harder than Kamui probably did and right on the same spot and Minatsuki lets out a tragic, gasp of a sob. Like some girl in a period dramas Izanami would watch  
“Why would you ask me that?” He snarls, pushing Minatsuki against the wall. “What the fuck do you want me to say?”  
Minatsuki doesn't respond, just stares at him. “There comes a time when you can’t hide from the things that you’ve done anymore”  
Laica let’s go and Minatsuki’s grin is wry “Karma is a bitch. I fear I can’t escape her”  
“Don’t talk like that” Laica hisses, sitting on the bed.  
“Why not?” Minatsuki snaps, eyes on Laica’s again before he throws his head back with an almost inhuman cry. “Fuck that hurt my cheek” Like everything bottled up from the night expels out with that one exclaim.  
“I’m sorry” Laica tries and Minatsuki sit’s beside him.  
“No you’re not” He looks over, smile sad.  
“No, I’m not. My palm is stinging, if that helps” He adds on the end, kicking his feet a little.  
“A little” Minatsuki draws it out with a grin. “Sartre says-”  
“Stop right there” Laica mutters. “No sentence that opens with Sartre says is ever going to be anything other than completely pretentious”  
Minatsuki laughs, bellied and warm. “I am the epitome of pretentious.”  
Laica laughs too, like the fight they had seconds prior meant nothing, even if they’ll both be awake thinking about it tonight, with worked out, unspoken apologies, heavy on them in the morning.  
“He says ‘We’re condemned to be free’ that anything other than that is just bad faith. He says the thought of true freedom is too much for mankind so we create reasons for living...reasons for dying” He adds on the end, eyes flickering to check Laica’s reaction.  
“Do I understand what you’re trying to say here, Minatsuki” Laica asks, voice measured even though it sounds a lot like Minatsuki’s giving up at the first hurdle and suddenly the urge to kill him is frightfully hard to control. Minatsuki just laughs, quiet and terrified. He always picks up on those sorts of things.  
“Probably not. I don’t. Forget it” He says in one, tumbling over the words. “Honestly I shouldn’t be allowed to read” He looks over with a laugh, one that begs for Laica’s forgiveness.  
“Put some ice on that” Laica stands, too angry to say anything else. He’s grinding his teeth, a habit he hates in himself.  
“Laica-” Minatsuki sounds desperate, he wanted comfort, forgiveness for his sins, for killing Quinn and a touch that could take the pain out the sting in his cheek. Laica took nothing, just added to it all. Another weight on Minatsuki’s slender little shoulder. One he refuses to take on his own.  
It’s funny, really. How Minatsuki never learns, how he always comes to Laica even thought Laica never fails to hurt him. It’s strange how little he considered Minatsuki’s autonomy and he’s stupidly angry that Minatsuki acted as a leader- the thing Laica made him- so effectively, which is stupid in itself.  
He worries his inconsistency will ruin how carefully he’s conditioned Minatsuki, the layering of himself and something else that creates the picture perfect leader they have. The picture perfect leader who’s falling apart because of him because Laica can’t step back. Minatsuki can’t love him because Minatsuki is Eden and Laica is the serpent and god all at once, playing the game and controlling it and failing at both. He hates himself because Minatsuki does love him. He’s played god and maybe he’s lost.  
He thinks of Kamui, sobbing and violent over Quinn and wonders if that’s what real love feels like. Real and true and not manipulated or callous.  
Yet as he lies in bed, thinking of apologies he wont say to Minatsuki. With that red hot guilt deep in his stomach and an insatiable want just to hold him, bury his head in those thick blonde strands and breath in his cologne.  
He can’t help but wonder if that is true love.  
Not that it matters. It’s too late now anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a real thing about Minatsuki getting the shit beat out of him. I'll need to write one where that doesn't happen...it's just strangely hot.


End file.
